I try more and more to be myself, caring relatively little whether people approve or not.
When i was growing up my parent always taught me to never disregard anyone and if you can help then do just that.I realize the more you help one,MORE come.I always wanted to save the world growing up from all its problems but i was too small and the strength it needed i wasn’t ready to offer, I even tried counselling a random smoker on effects of smoking, lets say that conversation never lasted that long, but i just wanted the message to pass through.
When i was 14,i had a quote book with all the favorite quotes from John Adams to Victor van Gogh to name a few. Quotes made meaning to me and problems seemed more easy to fix, if you read hard enough.
GROWING up i wasnt the talkative type,i only spoke when it need be, i let things suffocate me,if i had a problem i thought i was the best to solve it on my own because at the end”humans need to learn to survive on their own”.I pretty much did just that. My quote book was my platform.
The love for writing came with my fear of speaking my heart.I could never say my thoughts or defend myself without shedding a tear and if anyone came up to me i will always let them have a stand, i kept my voice hidden cause i never trusted anyone enough for them to hear it. if i couldn’t say it i wrote it. I remember a conflict i once had with a relative when i was a kid, i felt really bad to have annoyed or mishandled the situation with an older person but to say it to him was harder for me than to write it, you call it pride i call glossophobia, so one day before i went to school i decided to write a short letter not more than two lines expressing my regrets, and slipped it to him and left. when i came back to school i went to him and patched things up and never talked about the letter again. I know many people have felt trapped in their own words and am here to say i was one of them.
I promise it gets better while you grow, because it did for me now my thoughts and opinion matters more to me heard than written, but writing has always been a hobby to me and i enjoy.
I still think that the most wise of people are those that speak less and leave a lasting impressions. So don’t be afraid.